面孔摄影

她对读书时的事情记忆深刻。由于出身黄冈，对那里教育深有体验，在很小时候便知竞争含义，觉得乖巧中有种扭曲的隐忍。她要做乖巧的好学生，没有去过游戏厅。等去了桂林读大学，她被释放，所有的都要被弥补回来。

有一年暑假，她的笔记本电脑被偷，于是瞒着家人租房在外，每天打工两份。白天在饰品店导购，晚上又去酒吧收银。日子很辛苦，她坐公交就会睡去。半夜回来，心中恐惧，穿过黑黝黝的洞形道路，放声高歌，一路飞奔，到家紧闭房门一头躺倒。酒吧让她后来厌倦夜店生活，她熟悉那里的一切游戏，决不嗑药。最终用打工赚来的钱攒了台式机，一直使用至今。

但她也不会耽误学业，该怎么就怎么。入党、拿奖学金，拿双学位，跟乐队混过，也与朋友出去周游，在桂林呆了5年。她大学很荒诞也很幸福，自我比喻那时的青春就如同一颗坚硬却甜蜜的廉价果糖。

毕业后，因为好友来到北京。本不做长久打算，在第一份工作中认识了现在的男朋友，感情稳定，交往至今。也许是大学尝试过散漫不羁，她越来越喜欢稳定的生活，工作也趋于固定。感情是第一次拥有稳定长久的，不过，她说，结婚应该是水到渠成的事情。

怀念桂林，那是她永远的桃花源，希望终有一日能携爱人终老在那个美丽的地方。至于眼前，她说自己是个很没有安全感的人，时时不安却坚定的活着，希望能更加独立和从容。

时间：2008年10月18日
地点： 石佛营东里
摄影： 阿三
文字：阿三

face 78-momo

She has a vivid memory of the old days when she was in school.As she had spent her school days in  Huanggang City which is a major municipality in eastern Hubei Province, she knew in her early years the meaning of competence.In her character, there was twisted tolerance in quiet appearance.She wanted to be a good student who behaves well,so she never went to bingo hall.It was when she went to college in Guilin that she felt freed and wanted to make up for all the lost joy.

One summer holiday,her laptop was stolen,so she rented a room outside the school and found two part-time jobs,without her parents’ knowledge.In the daytime,she worked in the as a shopping assistant.At night,she was a cashier in the bar.Exhausted in life,she would fall asleep in bus.Going home at midnight,she carried in her heart the terror when walking through the dark road with arched top,so she sang loud,ran fast,and finally fell on the bed after she got home and closed the bedroom door.The bar tired her of the nightclub life.She was familiar with all games them,so she never took drugs. Finally,she bought a desktop computer with the money he saved by hard work,and she is still using the computer.

But she knew studies admitted of no delay and she always did what she was supposed to do.During her five years in Guilin，she applied for Party membership，getted scholarship，earned a joint degree，muddled along with bands，and went outing with friends.Her college life was absurd but happy.She compared the youth at that time to be a hard but sweet cheap candy.

After graduation,she came to Beijing for her friend’s sake.She didn’t plan to stay long,but she knew her present boyfriend through her first job.Their attachment is steady and the relationship has lasted till now.Perhaps she had tried to be unrestrained in college,so she liked the stable life better.It was the first stable and lasting relationship which she owned,but she said,marriage was a natural thing when conditions were ripe.

She missed Guilin，her forever dreamland，where she wished one day she could live her whole life there with her lover.As for the present,she said she had no sense of security.She lived worriedly but with a firm attitude, and she hoped to become more independent and deliberate.

Time:Oct.18,2008

Location: Dongli Community ,Shifouying

Photographer:A San

Text:A San

Translator: Carrie

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